face gunk - what's it all for?

Friday, 30 October 2015


you might remember that a couple of weeks ago now, by some stroke of luck, i won "best dressed" at the bloggers blog awards ceremony in leeds. i know, still shocked over here too. nevertheless, i was gifted with a pretty epic goody bag as part of my prize, and within that epic goody bag was a ~lot (and i do mean a lot) of "face gunk" - for lack of a better word. mostly because a better word fucking escapes me.

hi, my name is erica, and i don't look after my skin. i have no particular skin care "regime", nor do i particularly care about "anti-ageing" or the covering up of fine lines. oh, and i don't drink nearly enough water. like, maybe a litre a week. that's not even a joke! i mean, yeah of course i'm getting old and i'm ~noticing that i'm getting old, but... that's life? i drink too much booze, stay out too late, eat crappy food on occasion, and i don't exercise; what kind of fucking miracle am i expecting?

aaanyway, so what; i'm old. the face gunks were all like "stop getting old" and i'm all, "it's too fucking late!" and so, yeah. i mean i don't even know. what my point is except that now i have a drawer of anti-ageing serums and potions and, well, gunks - and i don't have the foggiest what to do with them all.

and just in case that wasn't "bad" (it's not bad, and i'm very grateful) enough, i also went a won some ~more face gunk in the charity raffle. at least these one - from the kiehl's range, i had heard of. still not a clue what they're for or how to use them, but name-brand face gunk is the kind of gunk you want, right? so now i have a drawer full of shit i don't know how to use, and instructions on the packaging that read crap like:

centella recovery skin salve
use both day and night on face and body as needed to help soothe temporary irritation. gentle enough for use by all skin types. smooth a small amount of formula gently and evenly onto clean skin. allow to dry before applying sun cream or make up.

so... just use it then, yeah? on your skin. at all times. before make up though.

ultra facial cream
apply to clean facial skin day or night as needed to combat moisture depletion.

so again, rub that shit into your face skin.

daily reviving concentrate
has no directions, therefore i have no fucking clue what to do with it.

then there's like a body moisturiser which i can basically grasp the concept of, and then something called "powerful wrinkle reducing cream" which i reckon i can figure out how to use with little effort. but, considering i don't actually use ~anything on my face/skin/body parts at the moment except for like hand cream and elbow grease, i'm not sure i entirely ~want to use any of this gunk. i have pretty sensi skin and with any tiny change to routine (make up wipe at night, foam cleanser in the shower, foundation in the day), i break out. your powerful wrinkle reducing cream is no match for my super oily adult acne-prone skin, and i just don't want to chance it. so, yeah. what the hell do i do now? any help is truly appreciated at this stage.

i am failing hard at being a human female.

2 comments:

  1. Ooooh please let me know when you find out.

    Love,
    A fellow clueless human female
    xx

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ooooh please let me know when you find out.

    Love,
    A fellow clueless human female
    xx

    ReplyDelete

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