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30 July 2017


carmen is my flatmate. she's also my oldest friend in the uk. not by age, but it's close (and true, i know you're reading this, you old hag) to that too. i met her in my first ever job in the uk and we bonded over cheap rose, fried food, and angry girl music from the indie rock persuasion. we were (and still are) total opposites, and the rest of our office had bets on how quickly the two of us would realise we actually hated each other. well, joke's on you guys: we have always hated each other! we just, also, sort of, like each other a bit too. which is essentially the foundation for our friendship.

that was seven years ago though, and last year we made a real commitment to each other and moved in. we official signed documents to confirm we'd be mates for another 18 months of our lives (actually, that's coming up - carmen, remind me me to look into that whole tenancy thing tomorrow), and we went about buying furniture and cushions and splitting bills down the middle. glam, no? the funny thing is that in more than a year of living together, and we hardly see each other. i'm always out, she's always in, and we're sort of like ships that pass in the night, so when the opportunity came around to celebrate national friendship day with a chilled girls night in, there was literally only one person i could think to "invite over" - her.

organising our night-in was a breeze; the whole text conversation went a bit like this:

me: you in on sunday?
her: yea bitch
me: want to celebrate our love for each other with free pizza and wine?
her: ....
me: ....
her: is this a trick question?
me: you can pick the wanky movie
her: i already have one in mind
me: is that a yes?
her: yea bitch

so that sort of gives you a glimpse into our precious and precarious relationship. not two days earlier i was abusing her by text for leaving dishes in the sink and she was moaning at me for buying yet another mop. her mop was shit, and mine is better. so there.

we had a couple of local pizzas ordered in and had a chilled bottle of i heart wines' prosecco ready to go, and i let her pick the film. this was a mistake, yet one i make time and time again; she picked arachnophobia at first, before swiftly moving on to a film that would placate us both: bad moms. it was great, but really should have been called mean moms as it's a blatant rip off of mean girls, just with 30-somethings instead of high schoolers. but, seeing as that's my favourite film of all time... i reckon she did ok in the end. i guess she's ok too. 

i could certainly do worse as far as flatmates go (trust me, i have), and as a pal, she's one that's stuck by me through thick and thicker. i'll probably keep her for a bit longer... happy national friendship day, you silly old tart.

*pizza and wine courtesy of i heart wines. all thoughts are mine.

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